Amy Winehouse's Suicide Note

If you know me, you know that I am a huge Amy Winehouse fan. Her music was beyond being melodiously accorded...they were dialogue of the heart. They were sentiments translated into textual cries. Every song was a redemption song and every song relinquished some type ofbottled up unexplainable feeling that I've felt.

Her suicide note has just recently surface the internet -- about 4 months post her unexpected death and it made me really process and understand her life in a different light:

Death, a shape, a thing. Death, a sound, a movement. Death is black, death is going back to black. They use my face. They use my eyes. They sell my soul. They touch me, they molest me. They tell me to stand,

they tell me to sing. They plead with me to become.

They make me filthy, then they say they want to cleanse me. Death, the hour awaits, I have nothing, I am neither human nor a machine, stuck in between. I am neither a thing nor a feeling. I am neither alive nor dead. Death, the voice that sinks, the happiness that lingers in the flesh itself.

Death, they tell me to sing for the people. I say nothing, my words are nothing but futile distraction. I lie to humanity. I am a false icon. I am a disease, they, want me to spread. They want me to distract, they use my suffering as a tool to keep the people watching.

When will she break down? I want to break down. Death, awaits those with nothing left. Death, awaits those who betray their life for the meaningless rewards of the future. I want to die, I will die, moments,

appearances, all falsities. They want me to sing and dance, they want me to please when there is only suffering left. They want me to be genuine, when it is all process. Fame, fake happiness, pretend desires. It’s all fake, it’s all dead.

Death, it’s all really dead.

Death, I’ve died a hundred times, so what’s one more.

Amy personified death. Her soul was already dead to her. Her mind, her heart, her sense of self...it was all dead. So what's one more way to die (physically) when every other aspect of her was dead in her perspective. It's a strange way to look at life but she almost described herself as a puppet in which her fans appreciated her "dead" self. She made money off of her "dead" self.

What do you reader's think about her note in respect to her life as a musician?

Does this make you understand her music in a different way?

I want to hear your thoughts, comments and opinions!

LONG LIVE AMY